Patterns, habits, consistencies in human nature, whatever you would like to call them, everyone has a character that is developed partly by there surroundings. For example, those of us raised in Maine don't flinch at a little snow driving. It is normal, and as such, does not create a sense of fear in us. Our character is built to be strong and resolute, at least when it comes to weather. Although we do like to complain about the sudden changes, we also delight in bragging about our driving ability in large snow drifts. Pride. Another one of those New Englander traits. My Pastor calls it "Yankee Pride"; clearly he doesn't understand the New England disgust with the term "Yankee". Yankees are from New York and New Jersey, NOT New England. WE are the foundation of the Nation. The revolution started here, and with that deep history begins our deep failure.
Do you want to know what happens with Pride? We find ourselves alone. All. The. Time. We cannot ask for help, we cannot confide in others our sense of loss, and we certainly cannot admit that we are below par. A great many factors have contributed to this slippery slope. One being that we do have something to be proud of. Another being that as the number of children in a family decreases the ratio of firstborn children to non-firstborn children rises. Is this such a big deal? It is when you are contemplating pride. First borns are perfectionists and take great pride in our work. Believe me, I have 3 functional firstborns in my house; we are a force to be reckoned with. Regardless of how many factors we see are adding to the thick pride over the East of the United States; things are changing.
More and more churches, towns, and businesses are reaching out trying to develop a sense of community. Interesting enough this "community" requires from us New Englanders everything that we were taught to never do. It requires us to open up to others, lean on others, and seek help outside of ourselves.
A dozen years ago, I was a math tutor. I tutored high school and college students from the public, private and home school sectors of education. In my past experience the average homeschooler couldn't afford to pay a tutor what the public school was paying. The average homeschooler, both when I was young and when I was tutoring, was a large one income family. This was a family that sacrificed a second income to keep their children at home. This was a family that had more than the average number of children, but some of the best behaved, polite and respectful children you would ever hope to meet. As a result, I often bartered or received half of my normal pay from a homeschool family. I didn't mind though, because I knew that someday that would be me. I would be the mother of many children struggling to figure out how to pay taxes and pay for tutors, piano lessons, sports, and any co-ops that we joined. It adds up.
As I started homeschooling my own children I noticed a lack of leadership among homeschooling mothers. Where were these veterans who broke the mold so many years ago? What we didn't realize is that a large part of homeschooling is keeping your children home, and therefore, these experienced moms were home with their children. A large complaint I have heard is that us New Englanders may now start to want community, but we aren't willing to commit to it. If it becomes hard to make our Thursday morning science group, then we don't go. If we are tired from a late night with the baby, then we drop the day's co-op. I struggle with this. I find a great amount of benefit in local science groups, co-ops and the like, but I don't want them controlling my schedule or my school.
Recently, however, as in the past year, there are a number of co-ops that are succeeding. A lot of homeschoolers are meeting once a week, every week, to help each other train their children. Not only are we finally starting to understand this sense of community, but we are committing to it. Some of these groups are even charging a fee. Which I find especially interesting. As a result, I started to take a mental poll of how this could be. Well, What did I find out? The new homeschooler on the block isn't a family of 10 with one small income, one minibus, an overtired mom, and a desire to be home. No, it is a family of 4 or 5, with a one large income earner, 2 vehicles, a large home, and a desire to be in charge of giving their children multiple experiences in their education. Do I think this is good? Yes, and no. But that is beside the point. What is great is to see that homeschooling is growing. What is also great is to see the obvious attention to the importance of education for our children.
So the next time you are out and about on a school day with your kiddos, and you see another homeschooler. Be thankful, think, ask, and learn from their approach. But be forewarned, more and more of the new homeschoolers are not Christians; so please don't assume that they are. Instead build a friendship on your mutual desire to educate your children and teach them about Jesus.
